Marriage: Effort Equals Excellence

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Marriage: Effort Equals Excellence

Most people define the success of a marriage by certain criteria. The ability to cohabitate without problems, the level of excitement and frequency of their bedroom antics, or each person’s ability to provide financially for their household are all front runners. While compatibility, sex, and money ARE important players in the marriage game, I believe that they are only get you so far.

The ability to encourage a person, spiritually bonding, offering the gift of open, creative expression, and showing your partner that you fully support their life choices, bring a marriage to the next level. By prompting your other half to strive for their goals in life and allowing them to do so in their own unique way, you are saying, “You are an amazing person and need to show the world!”. This boosts self-confidence and self-love. If your partner loves themselves, it is a guarantee that they will love you even more.

Spiritually bonding makes the meaning of marriage deep. Understanding a person’s thought process, connecting through religion or similar beliefs or finding about their past, are all examples of ways a couple can build their spiritual connection and establish a means of open communication. Support is also a key factor in marriage. Showing the one you love that you truly will stand with them in all aspects, even if you disagree, illustrates that you are part of their team, part of the small group that will take up arms beside them in their personal battles.

Marriage is work. There are several obstacles that each couple faces. I am a firm believer that communication and active listening are two things that place a marriage on solid ground. It is okay to disagree, but it is not alright to stop trying. Put effort into your relationship and your partner will mirror that effort. If they don’t, talk about it. If they don’t want to fix the problem, that person isn’t really your partner. Each relationship will be tested through different forms of hardship: financial ruin, miscarriage, infidelity, etc., but a marriage dies when both parties refuse to put in work.


“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”

Mignon McLaughlin

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